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Bud Wright: Hang in there — it will all be over soon

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As I was growing to maturity (OK, that one’s debatable) the most subversive influence on America’s youth was MAD magazine. If you are a card-carrying Baby Boomer (and these days it’s an AARP card) then you harbor fond memories of Alfred E. Neuman (what ... me worry?), cartoonist Don Martin’s grotesquely comical creations and Spy vs. Spy.

This little slice of cultural chaos was a little pricey (“50 cents ... cheap”) so for me it was an occasional indulgence. But whenever I could scrounge up the four bits it made for a blissful afternoons lampooning of societal norms — when that was far from common.

What made MAD special was the way it took ordinary facets of American life and turned them inside out. Generally speaking, it was stuff that otherwise went unexamined.

I still remember one parody from the early ’60s wherein a “reporter” interviewed a pot-bellied cop who was a proud member of the John Birch Society. It was howlingly funny — and enlightening. There were equally lacerating spoofs of the counterculture. Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter once observed that MAD was “ready to pounce on the illogical, hypocritical, self-serious and ludicrous.”

Where is MAD when we need it? Oh, it’s still around but it no longer enjoys the cultural cachet it once did.

All of the following tidbits were found circulating about the inter-web. None were prominently reported in the mainstream media. They were not reported at all in the right-wing media. That’s because the media doesn’t care, our politicians prevaricate and we-the-people disregard anything that gets in the way of our preconceived, predigested perceptions.

• This week, Mitt Romney (who is vowing to repeal Obamacare — which is the mirror-image of the health care bill Mitt himself pushed for and signed into law as governor of Massachusetts) stated that; “We don’t have people who die in their apartment because they don’t have insurance.

Estimates vary, but even the most conservative guesstimate is that between 30 and 50 thousand people die each year in this country as a direct result of being uninsured. The most despicable aspect of Mitt’s remark is that he knows this. We often yearn for a cure for death by cancer. We could cure death by apathy with the stroke of a pen.

• Republican Wisconsin state Rep. Roger Rivard made the observation, this week, that; “Some girls rape easy.” He was affectionately quoting his father. The point he was attempting to make is that rape is very often a simple case of buyer’s remorse. Did you ever wonder how ignorance and bigotry propagate so easily?  Children are empty vessels — and it is parents who fill them.

• Former Republican Arkansas state Rep. Charlie Fuqua (who is running again) has called for the forced sterilization of negligent parents. Actually, we did have a brush with eugenics back in the early decades of the 20th century. It’s one of the uglier chapters in our history.

Fuqua doesn’t like Islam or kids any better than bad parents. He believes that ALL Muslims should be deported and has called for the death penalty for rebellious children. No, I am not making any of this up, nor am I distorting his views. It’s all in his book; “God’s Law,” in which he cites the Bible as his inspiration.

For his enlightened views on the family unit, Fuqua has been rewarded with several terms in the Ark. State House and the “Friend of the Family” award from the Arkansas Christian Coalition a few years back.

He doesn’t sound that friendly to me.

• Republican Rep. Scott DesJarlais is a Tea Party darling who is running for re-election in Tennessee. He is also a volubly Christian, pro-life physician who impregnated one of his patients (he was married at the time) and then pressured her to get an abortion — in writing. She was one of four indiscretions which he admitted to. This was all verified in court documents and was a matter of public record during the last election cycle. No-one cared. He won in a walk. He will again.

• Florida real estate billionaire David Segal has informed all 7,000 of his employees that they will be fired if Barack Obama is re-elected. Atta’ boy, Dave! Thanks for demonstrating to all those liberal weasels that conservatives are the real job creators.

• Mitt Romney has criticized President Obama for daring to suggest that our schools could use more and better teachers. Yeah, because all that I have recounted lends itself to the suggestion that we are decidedly over-educated.

Meanwhile, all of those accursed political ads will be gone within the month — and I will finally be able to plug my phone back in.

Bud Wright is an author and Pasquotank County resident

Comments

Bud, Bud, Bud

There you go again. Picking on those mean Republicans. Joe Biden (democrat) - Joe Biden appeared in Virginia before a group of supporters, a number of them African-American, and said this of Republican Mitt Romney: “He is going to let the big banks once again write their own rules, unchain Wall Street. He is going to put y'all back in chains." Who knows what Biden was thinking? (the vice president surely doesn’t). No one in the main stream media cared. Senator Robert Byrd (democrat) - Senator Robert Byrd, a former Ku Klux Klansman who the Democrats at one point made their majority leader, used the “N-word” during a television interview in 2001. Byrd apologized and, after a few days, no one cared. Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee (democrat) - Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee accused Newt Gingrich of using racist “code words” in his public remarks during the presidential campaign. In other words, Newt didn’t say anything blatantly racist, but I am going to attack him for what I think he probably meant even if he didn’t. Last year the Congresswoman accused Republicans battling the Obama administration on the debt ceiling of being racists as well. No big deal, right? Rev Al Sharpton (democrat) - "White folks was in caves while we was building empires... We taught philosophy and astrology and mathematics before Socrates and them Greek homos ever got around to it." Nancy Pelosi (democrat) - "Every week we don’t pass a Stimulus package, 500 million Americans lose their jobs.” Nancy Pelosi (democrat) - "unemployment benefits are creating jobs faster than practically any other program." Romneycare is not like Obamacare - Romneycare is State mandated health insurance, it can be repealed by the voters of Massachusetts if they so desire. But, you get my drift - look around - there are folks of all stripes (Democrat, Republican, Libertarian...) that have made some questionable comments. A big difference is the main stream media (and Bud) will point out those made by Republicans. They'll let those made by Democrats slide.

Thanks for taking up the

Thanks for taking up the discussion. I am in full agreement. I enjoy Bud's writing, even his one-sidedness (which makes for lively discussion), but I'd like to think he isn't REALLY as partisan as his writings suggest.

I think Bud may have taken a course or two

at MAD University. Said with tongue in cheek of course.

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